My last post seems to have caused some sort of mass debate, so we decided not to look for Britney Spears snatch but for Paris Hilton’s lobby for Nobby. We landed in Los Angeles at about 3:00 pm on a Saturday. We’d seen the Grand Canyon from the air, but there had been no sign of the Snatch d’Or. I was beginning to think she was out of town. The pre-booked cab was waiting for us and was driven not, as we’d expected, a cab-driver, but by an out of work comedian whose favourite punchline was “Don’t even ask. If I told you you wouldn’t believe me anyway.” which he used quite a lot. (A line a London cabbie can only use when he is genuinely prepared to take you home quickly and for a reasonable fare).
Anyway, at the end of day 1 there was no sign of either Paris Hilton’s snatch or Britney Spears. Or, indeed, any B & Q Christmas Trees.