Waitrose. Girl.

I was shopping in Waitrose on Saturday with my wife. As I prepared the selected goods for scanning, the check out girl smiled at me and said “Hello. How are you?” Now I’m no fool and I can see a come on when it happens, so I waved my left hand at her face so that she could see my wedding ring and said “You may be very attractive indeed, young lady, but I’m married, so there’ll be none of that!”

I was expecting my wife to be happy with my display of loyalty and faithfulness but, instead, she cried. Weird. 

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3 Responses to Waitrose. Girl.

  1. Nobby says:

    You’re turning into the Viz character Major Misunderstanding me old son.

  2. Jim says:

    Blimey, know what you mean mate. Waitrose check out girls. I have to beat them off with a shitty stick. Or a big french stick. I’m not allowed to go to Waitrose anymore, I go to Safeways which is a shame cos there are more dogs in there than Crufts.

  3. Mr Outraged of Maidenhead says:

    Surpised as I am that you’re married (surely an internet arrangement). I’m unsurprised that you didn’t recognize good manners and breeding from the Waitrose employee. I imagine that your “wife” started crying because she remembered that she was married to you

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